lame comments

[Peninsula Friend]

Long-time member
First-time poster

Personally, I think Centaur's comments about each new girl are pretty lame. There must be someone at AW who doesn't have an advertising degree and a need to write crap.

As in..........

"Facing away from the camera and reaching around behind, Melita's arse is in plain view, as are her fingers rubbing her dark pussy. Melita moans louder and louder as her climax approaches, until she finally explodes when she is overwhelmed by the horny feelings.

Who writes that junk anyway?

[cleo]

what would you suggest be written?
I'll admit, sometimes I read the little blurbs and I giggle to myself a little bit...but in most cases I think they're pretty good...

wasnt sue-ann helping him out last week with the comments??

[hauskatavata]

I agree Sue-Ann was better, she was less clinical.

[sue-ann]

Aww thanks, but be nice- hope you haven't hurt Centaur's feelings!

[lanbo]

Just to chip in, here, I would like say how difficult it is to write constructively, imaginatively and creatively on a short scale, with a limited subject, over and over again.

If I had to do this, I wouldn't be impressed by lame criticisms such as 'crap' and 'junk'.

[hauskatavata]

Just to chip in, here, I would like say how difficult it is to write constructively, imaginatively and creatively on a short scale, with a limited subject, over and over again.

If I had to do this, I wouldn't be impressed by lame criticisms such as 'crap' and 'junk'.

I think it's a matter of style, not creativity or ability.

[lanbo]

Yes, but 'style' is just a categorisation of a piece of writing. The writing still has to be done. And all writing of this nature is creative.
Playing with words, here.

I just didn't like Peninsula Friend's carping. Maybe he could offer to contribute something positive ...

[cleo]

yeah, thats why I asked him for something he would use.

It is hard to write something descriptive but different so many times over and over again..you dont wanna use the same words about models over and over again...and theyre pretty much all doing the same series of things.

I can imagine it wouldnt be easy. cut lil centaur some slack

[lanbo]

cut lil centaur some slack

What does this mean? is it a mis-type? I get confused.
You could be imaginative with descriptons, if you had the motivation and the time.
By the way, there's centaurs in my book. Slack cut some Centaur, lil.
Lil, centaur some cut slack.
Cut some lil centaur slack.

????

Brad (very confused) Lanbo

[sterling2]

wake up on the wrong side of the bed did ya .

[lanbo]

wake up on the wrong side of the bed did ya .

Who?

Not me, I'm always happy.

[lanbo]

cut lil centaur some slack

some centaur! lil, cut slack.
slack lil, cut some centaur!
li'l cut, slack centaur, some.
Cut! some centaur! slack lil.

or is it a multi-word anagram? Cleo, please shed some light, before I start an anagram search.

Brad

[ren]

What does this mean? is it a mis-type? I get confused.
Lanbo

To 'cut some slack' means give him a break/give him a little leeway its not easy.

[lanbo]

To 'cut some slack' means give him a break/give him a little leeway its not easy

Oh, thanks, ren. What would I do without you?
So 'cut .....li'l (short for little?) Centaur (the person with this name) ... some slack !!!!!!!
GOT IT

(Why lil ? is Centaur a small / short person?)
by the way, ren, saw your cooking tip. Great. I'm always doing that!

[ren]

Oh, thanks, ren. What would I do without you?
by the way, ren, saw your cooking tip. Great. I'm always doing that!

LOL nps. I was just being a smart arse about he cooking tip though, not everyone is as stupid as me with cooking :p

Back on topic I agree about teh lameness on the set intros. I mean some of it sounds lame as, but I suppose after this long and after doing this many sets and how often they are posted wtf else would you say about them?

[flatspin]

Hey I only checked out this thread in case the 'lame comments' being talked about were mine!

Anyway, I thought Sue-Ann was fresh and interesting filling in. I think Centaur's on a hiding to nothing here trying to think of something new about each model.

I know I've tried and failed.

[bookmanz]

For a long while, Centaur has done a good job on the daily blurbs on the news page.
I know it is not easy to write good content without sounding like you're repeating yourself.

I do agree that Sue-Ann's blurbs were good too.

[arsby]

Centaur can use this sentence generator!
http://sentence.bigparadox.com/default.asp?action=fromOtherSite&speechID=4148

I created it here. (http://sentence.bigparadox.com/) Find the generator called "george". If you want to add to it the password is "abby".

[Luxman]

Bwahaha, Arsby, that's funny!

Lxm

[Peninsula Friend]

Here's a low class example from today:

" Mandie can push and squeeze her boobs all around, even licking them herself. She loves her clit and her big lips which are one of her best features."

Here's some worthless filler from Thursday:

"Facing away from the camera and reaching around behind, Melita's arse is in plain view, as are her fingers rubbing her dark pussy. Melita moans louder and louder as her climax approaches, until she finally explodes when she is overwhelmed by the horny feelings."

AW is far classier than most of the comments in the intros.
Gee-zus does one even need comments when there's women like Brittany, Melita, Mandie, and holy crap - little Carly T?

[arsby]

Here's a low class example from today:

" Mandie can push and squeeze her boobs all around, even licking them herself. She loves her clit and her big lips which are one of her best features."
...

PF, I think you're taking Centaur's blurbs waaaay too seriously. I personally think that he means for those blurbs to be a little over the top, and he'd like people to be amused and a little tittilated by them. To me they seem like a parody of the things you see in mainstream porn. I don't think he's going for class, and I really don't think the site is going for class. They're going for good erotic fun and that's what Centaur's doing, too.

Now go back and play with my Centaur Sentence Generator from a couple posts back and laugh a little. Maybe you can create a classy one.

[Frans]

Now go back and play with my Centaur Sentence Generator from a couple posts back and laugh a little. Maybe you can create a classy one.

Hehe, that's a funny thing. This one is quite classy I think "The model vigorously pummels her pink bit and she sneezes as her hand rubs her breasts. " ;)

[sangean]

If there are pictures, I don't need explaining words for them at all. ;)

[cleo]

peninsula friend...you still havent given any examples of the sort of thing that you'd like to see written?

sorry lanbo that i wasnt around to explain what cut some slack was :p I just called him "lil centaur" coz...well, i dunno :p lol...just a little niceity

[lanbo]

sorry lanbo that i wasnt around to explain what cut some slack was I just called him "lil centaur" coz...well, i dunno lol...just a little niceity

Well, Cleo; ren explained it to me just fine! you were out camping, I think.

lil Brad

[FloridaRob]

Centaur does fine blurbs! While I might envy his "job" to review every one for comments, I can imagine one might easily run out of university-quality lines to describe the action around here. Sue-Ann brought slightly different nuance to the task and I enjoyed it, as well as everything else about Sue-Ann <3:o immensely.

I've guessed that Sue-Ann stepped aside for a few days so as not to have to introduce her own triumphant, ground-breaking, nay, mindblowing episode with Violet.

(No, I'm just not available for the job!) :p

[eberhard]

Sometimes inspiriration grows out of forcing yourself to comply with the strict rules of verse. For example, today's gallery might have been presented this way:

Taysha's second shoot
She's on the sofa this time.
Water in backyard.

On the link arsby refers to, there is also a Haiku generator, if you need more help.

[Frans]

Sometimes inspiriration grows out of forcing yourself to comply with the strict rules of verse. For example, today's gallery might have been presented this way

That last line is almost a riddle to me. Since I'm lazy I prefer descriptive blurbs :)

[Peninsula Friend]

Ok, here is an example...........

Existing:
Mandy M is already starting to get herself off when the video starts. She has her hand in her shirt fondling a breast, and it's not long until that hand finds its way into her knickers. Mandy rubs on her clit tirelessly for awhile until she can't hold back any longer.

Proposed:
Mandy M is so hot.

[FloridaRob]

Ok, here is an example...........

Existing:
Mandy M is already starting to get herself off when the video starts. She has her hand in her shirt fondling a breast, and it's not long until that hand finds its way into her knickers. Mandy rubs on her clit tirelessly for awhile until she can't hold back any longer.

Proposed:
Mandy M is so hot.

...I'm sure I prefer the "existing"! :o :p

Rob

[MightySpork]

Ok, here is an example...........

Existing:
Mandy M is already starting to get herself off when the video starts. She has her hand in her shirt fondling a breast, and it's not long until that hand finds its way into her knickers. Mandy rubs on her clit tirelessly for awhile until she can't hold back any longer.

Proposed:
Mandy M is so hot.Yeah, I agree with Rob. That's not an improvement at all; it's extremely short and generic, and doesn't do anything to distinguish this video from others in the Intimate Moments series. The existing text you chose as an example isn't that bad, I think, but it does fail to capture the excitement of the video itself, which is a problem with much of the writing.

It's a shame, because I'd assume that the main page is an important selling tool for the site, along with the tour pages (which are much better written), but I think the wooden writing style keeps the reader at too great a distance. It presents the basic information well enough, but doesn't make the action come alive. And in many places, it's just plain awkward -- for example, referring to Violet and Sue-Ann as "two experienced girl-girl sex participants," which isn't even slightly erotic.

I don't imagine it's easy to write these "raves," as they like to call them, on such a demanding schedule, but nonetheless there's plenty of room for improvement. Since this writing is all about erotic content, maybe it would be useful to read lots of high-end erotic fiction and note how the sex scenes are constructed.

And now, in the spirit of fairness, I'll offer up my own take on the Mandy M video, and let you guys kick it around a bit:
Mandy M gives her body the love it needs in this slow and steady Intimate Moment -- and you've got the perfect view. Flicking and squeezing her nipples with one hand, she caresses herself with the other -- over her skirt to begin with, then over her panties, finally sliding her hand beneath to drive herself to a hip-thrusting, breast-grabbing orgasm.
One key thing I did there was bring the reader into the action with "... and you've got the perfect view." Since the IMs overall have a voyeuristic appeal, this seems like a very natural way to make the writing more involving.

PS: One other point I wanted to bring up is that certain slang words have more power in some parts of the world than others. I can only speak for America, of course, but terms like arse and bum don't work as well here as they do in Australia and Europe.

[cleo]

yep!! My vote is with Rob and Sporky-Spork!! I much prefer the decriptive little blurbs because 1. when its my own shoot its interesting to know what was picked out as the main kinda features of it and also because it can lure you in to a shoot if you see something in that blurb that you like the sound of.

One line of Mandy M is sooo hot. tells me nothing, specially if I havent even taken the time to read what an Intimate Moments shoot really is.

and what do u do when U run out of words.

cleo is sexy, indianna is gorgeous....I mean...THESE THINGS ARE OBVIOUS! of course we are :p

[Althea]

I have filled in for Centaur before and it is alot harder than any of you may think. Sometimes yes, they can be a little cheesy but its not easy at all to write new and interesting blurbs everyday.

[cleo]

exactly!! Its only once u sit in the seat of someone doing this that u can truly appreciate how hard it would be.

No one can be cotinually creative without getting cheesy or slightly lame about what is essentially a similar thing...over and over again. I think centaur does well if you take that into consideration. I must say, some have made me shudder slightly..but all in all...i doubt anyone could do better.

[OdetteAW]

i have come late to this but i agree it would be difficult to describe a girl masturbating in new and exciting ways several times a day. Just look at how difficult it is to find non-lame non-cringe inducing literary erotica.
But what i was thinking was that somebody could come up with a list of synonyms for, say, attractive, wet, aroused etc. i think it was suggested (jokingly) that a similar cheat sheet be made for the models when writing the before and after thoughts...

[sue-ann]

And now, in the spirit of fairness, I'll offer up my own take on the Mandy M video, and let you guys kick it around a bit:
Mandy M gives her body the love it needs in this slow and steady Intimate Moment -- and you've got the perfect view. Flicking and squeezing her nipples with one hand, she caresses herself with the other -- over her skirt to begin with, then over her panties, finally sliding her hand beneath to drive herself to a hip-thrusting, breast-grabbing orgasm.
One key thing I did there was bring the reader into the action with "... and you've got the perfect view." Since the IMs overall have a voyeuristic appeal, this seems like a very natural way to make the writing more involving.

PS: One other point I wanted to bring up is that certain slang words have more power in some parts of the world than others. I can only speak for America, of course, but terms like arse and bum don't work as well here as they do in Australia and Europe.

Thanks for the helpful comments!

But what other slang words don't sorta "work" in the US? Being Aussies through and through we're not about to Americanize our raves overnight but it might help just to know which key words don't have as much impact as we'd like.

SueA

[FloridaRob]

Thanks for the helpful comments!

But what other slang words don't sorta "work" in the US? Being Aussies through and through we're not about to Americanize our raves overnight but it might help just to know which key words don't have as much impact as we'd like.

SueA

Ms. Ann! I think most of us here are agreed that there's absolutely nothing amiss with either your lines or Centaur's. Aussies and Americans may have some minor divergence in casual language but not enough to bear on the quality of the descriptions being debated here. I have never seen any problem, at all, with the descriptions.

In fact, I tried to make some fun here with a thread where we could laugh at some of the intentionally lurid, though basically laughable titles given video clips posted on "newsgroups", often to promote this or that porn site.

See http://forums.abbywinters.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=9297

Good thing we don't have one of those to describe the action around here! :eek:

[MightySpork]

But what other slang words don't sorta "work" in the US? Being Aussies through and through we're not about to Americanize our raves overnight but it might help just to know which key words don't have as much impact as we'd like.

I wouldn't suggest that you Americanize the raves at the expense of your Aussie, English and European audience. For all I know, perhaps my fellow Americans enjoy the exotic Australian tone.

Some Aus/UK terms have never sat well with me, and I can't say how much this is due to my being American, and how much is due to my just not liking the sound of them. I have always preferred the sound of "panties" instead of "knickers," because the latter has that harsh "K" sound that makes the word seem comical instead of sexy. But maybe if I were Australian, and had been hearing the word all my life, I'd feel differently.

And here's another interesting idea, for anyone who's interested: It's possible for Web sites to be engineered to display different writing to different viewers, based upon their location. While this is often used to accommodate non-English-speaking readers, it can also display UK English to the Aus/UK audience, and American English to the American audience.

[bookmanz]

Thanks for the helpful comments!
But what other slang words don't sorta "work" in the US? Being Aussies through and through we're not about to Americanize our raves overnight but it might help just to know which key words don't have as much impact as we'd like.
SueA

Oh, no, don't Americanize the raves. It's good, it is part of the AW experience. Americans get it.

Centaur's best blurbs are the ones that are fun or intriguing in some respect. Makes me want to look at the shoot that much quicker. The shoots are commented on in the AW Today daily post and in models postings weeks or months before they get on the site. Perhaps remembering some of those better comments and paraphrase them in the raves.

Oh, We're forgetting somebody here. What do YOU think Peninsula?:)

[Chasaffton]

I wouldn't suggest that you Americanize the raves at the expense of your Aussie, English and European audience. For all I know, perhaps my fellow Americans enjoy the exotic Australian tone.

Some Aus/UK terms have never sat well with me, and I can't say how much this is due to my being American, and how much is due to my just not liking the sound of them. I have always preferred the sound of "panties" instead of "knickers," because the latter has that harsh "K" sound that makes the word seem comical instead of sexy. But maybe if I were Australian, and had been hearing the word all my life, I'd feel differently.

I am with the MightySpork about the " knickers "

c

[cleo]

i dont think knickers is comical...I think it reminds me of being a kid :p I prefer underwear...so much more politically correct

[alexbee]

i dont think knickers is comical...I think it reminds me of being a kid :p I prefer underwear...so much more politically correct

After being an AW member for sooooo long, "undies" has become my preferred term. :o

[lanbo]

I know this is a bit off-topic, but when I was writing my novel (that sounds arrogant; sorry), I had difficulty with describing this item of underwear. When to use panties, or knickers, or underwear, or lower under garment? I had to decide on the most suitable word based on which character was speaking and the tone of the passage. Not at all sure I got it right.

[cleo]

maybe thats something I can look at when I read it if you send it lanboooooo

hahah...there is a thread about this somewhere...perhaps we should move this conversation there?

[OdetteAW]

in terms of panties.... it's a bad word i think. i've never ever ever heard a woman use the word panties. only men. maybe it's different in the US? what about 'undies'?
i like knickers though. i think it is cute

[OdetteAW]

ps- i thought he had already sent it? are we being misled cleo?
pps- i think lanbo was just dying to use phrases bgining with 'when i was writing my novel...' ;)

[arsby]

in terms of panties.... it's a bad word i think. i've never ever ever heard a woman use the word panties. only men. maybe it's different in the US? what about 'undies'?
i like knickers though. i think it is cute

Panties is a very common term for women's underpants here in the USA, used by men and women alike.
On the other hand, no one uses "knickers". Except me. People think it's cute. :)

Speaking of panties, this essay at Snopes (the Urban Legends search engine site) about panty fetishism in Japan (http://www.snopes.com/risque/kinky/panties.asp) speaks volumes about cultural perception of womenhood across cultures. Read the whole article, it's fascinating. (The way the author describes herself at the bottom of article is precious.)

[laerad]

Just thought I'd chip my tuppence worth in here as it's something I found a fair bit myself. It's more the crassness that will get under my skin. Sometimes it felt like centuar had bought a shovel and is really trying to dig down to it's most base level. I have always loved AW for the fact it has that shine of class, of taste and centaurs comments had previously caused me to cringe or even skip a photoshoot as it had just lost it's appeal.

What i will say is after seeing this thread up and then going back and reviewing the comments over the last week they seem to have improved. Now it's possible i'm just imagining this but I would say that centaur has taken the critisism on board and is doing a fine job now.

Just like to say thanks to Centaur for taking this onboard and raising the game. I can only imagine how difficult it is but I appreciate that extra effort to keep the site to the high standards it has set for itself.

[Havemercy]

A few weeks ago, I came across several issues of old Scandinavian "gents mags" which in addition to the pics had a paragraph or two (usually in English, French, and German) on every other page to narrate the story. I could only read the English, but the translations were often quite unnatural sounding (ie, not how a native speaker would say something), crude, or even comical. I get the impression that Centaur's native tongue is something other than English, but he does far better than the magazines!

Who really comes here for the articles? :p

HM

[bookmanz]

in terms of panties.... it's a bad word i think. i've never ever ever heard a woman use the word panties. only men. maybe it's different in the US? what about 'undies'?
i like knickers though. i think it is cute

Panties, Knickers, undies. None of these words are good or bad, right or wrong.
Odette, trust me, I'll always be reverential and endearing regarding your panties.:)

Psst... Peninsul, you've been quiet lately. What do YOU think?

[OdetteAW]

Panties, Knickers, undies. None of these words are good or bad, right or wrong.
Odette, trust me, I'll always be reverential and endearing regarding your panties.:)
?

no one said they were baaaaad (okay, maybe i did, but perhaps i was overstating) but certainly some words are more to certain people's tastes than others. and some particular turns of phrase can have very un sexy connotations for some individuals....
all personal taste (again) i suppose....

[Peninsula Friend]

No disrespect meant to Centaur, but Sue-Ann, your comments lately are very nicely written. Thanks kiddo.

[wannadance]

i've been here, what, 18 months now, and always read those blurbs.

i think centaur writes them like a man would and sue ann writes them as a woman would. they are both relaxed about this job, have to do it every day, after all...so i think the gender thang dictates the blurbs largely.

told you it was simplistic...

it reminds me of the time i asked, generally, what is so great about all these gynocological shots, all those _parts_ so close up, it just didn't do a THANG for me...there was a collective indrawn breath, followed by nearly visible male eye roll and casgrain, god love him, posted, you'd have to be a man to really appreciate them.

oh.

i still don't get it. i think those shots are alarming, kind of, quick, boil water, call the medics....i want to throw a sterile towel over her...

maybe that towel is, is, ME....maybe i want to lie on top and rub around, little tribby that i am. well. yeah. but she'd have to move her hands or we'd both need plastic surgery....


i need one of tom's drinks. whatever it is, pass me one...

dancer
already sitting down, so it doesn't matter what i drink...

[centaur]

i think centaur writes them like a man would and sue ann writes them as a woman would. they are both relaxed about this job, have to do it every day, after all...so i think the gender thang dictates the blurbs largely.

I think you hit the nail on the head about the man/woman thing. Thank you.

Sue-Ann won't have time to write all the blurbs, so you'll still be forced to listen to me about one third of the time. Or just don't read it. That might be best - just click on the photo;)

[lanbo]

Odette:

but certainly some words are more to certain people's tastes than others. and some particular turns of phrase can have very un sexy connotations for some individuals....
all personal taste (again) i suppose....

Yes, writers beware!
What turns one person on, will make another cringe. You can't please everybody, but I think if you challenge the female sensibility to words / phrases, and are acceptable, you are on the right track.

wannadance:

it reminds me of the time i asked, generally, what is so great about all these gynocological shots, all those _parts_ so close up, it just didn't do a THANG for me.

Why is gynaecological such an unsexy word? Almost every other term I can think of for the female genitalia has at least some element of sexiness, but Gyn? No.
Suspect it is too closely bound up with childbirth.

(honey, let me kiss your sweet pussy - ok.
honey, let me kiss your sweet gynaecological parts - not really sure I'd want to!)

[Peninsula Friend]

Well anyway, thanks Sue-Ann.

[wannadance]

lanbo concludes:

Why is gynaecological such an unsexy word? Almost every other term I can think of for the female genitalia has at least some element of sexiness, but Gyn? No.
Suspect it is too closely bound up with childbirth.

(honey, let me kiss your sweet pussy - ok.
honey, let me kiss your sweet gynaecological parts - not really sure I'd want to!)

dancer adds:

oh, i'd want to. there is no woman so clean, so groomed and so ready for her closeup as a woman on her way to a routine checkup at the lady doctor.

a woman with an emergency appt. for an unmentionable (but loudly mentioned at the receptionist's desk) discharge.? nah.

i was sitting in a shrinks waiting room once and this teen girl was on her cell delivering herself of a long and extremely detailed account of her visit to her lady doctor, which was evidently a STAT. in the way of southerners, she was talking to all who could hear, as well as her phone friend. and that was everyone in the bldg. it was truly a william burroughs nightmare scenario. she kept looking around to see that everyone could hear her long descriptions. i wish i could say that i finally yelled, will you shut the hell up? but i didn't, that time.

next time? unstoppable dancer.

[lanbo]

wannadance:

oh, i'd want to. there is no woman so clean, so groomed and so ready for her closeup as a woman on her way to a routine checkup at the lady doctor.


what if the doctor was male? would it not be more so?


i was sitting in a shrinks waiting room once and this teen girl was on her cell delivering herself of a long and extremely detailed account of her visit to her lady doctor, which was evidently a STAT. in the way of southerners, she was talking to all who could hear, as well as her phone friend. and that was everyone in the bldg.

The picture you were eloquently painting was interrupted by my igorance of STAT. Please tell. Is it a woman thing?

Gyne, STI, Urinary waiting rooms are such quiet places, normally. Who shouts in one of those places? A teen girl!!!!

[wannadance]

poor lanbo. i have boggled you with slang,sorry.

a 'lady doctor', in the usa, is a gynecologist of either sex. the lady refers to the patient, not the doctor. and yes, i guess a woman who was heterosexual would glam up even more for a male doctor. i dunno. i never thought of glamming up. my lady doc is a young guy i've known since he was a medical student. and i had an operation so that there isn't much to examine in there, nor reason. i suppose, if it became necessary to see him professionally, i could print, in lipstick, 'hi! welcome back! ' across my belly. or 'long time no see!' he'd love that.

STAT is a medical term for immediately, without delay of any kind, emergency. although i spent my entire career in medicine, i never bothered to look up what it actually means or the derivation....it's used ironically by many medical people, but you can tell by the tone of voice if it means someone is:

(various terms for trying to die follow:_

- crumping
- crashing
- circling the drain
-going down the tubes (or tubing)
-trying for a celestial discharge
-many many more...

my personal fave was always 'crashing'. it really implies all the urgency and consequences of delay...

hth, my friend.

dancer
(hi, btw. i am a woman, live in america, disabled from polio in childhood and going blind, but, all in all, pretty cheerful for an ole lady. nice to meet you...glad you are here...set a while and have some ice tea...)

[Mrs Roops]

oh, i'd want to. there is no woman so clean, so groomed and so ready for her closeup as a woman on her way to a routine checkup at the lady doctor.

Indeed, whenever I was in for an internal I would pop into the lav, change knickers and give myself a quick inspection with mirror. Same as brushing your teeth before seeing the dentist....

[Lesley]

STAT is a medical term for immediately, without delay of any kind, emergency. although i spent my entire career in medicine, i never bothered to look up what it actually means or the derivation


"Stat": it's short for statim, the Latin word for immediately.

L

[lanbo]

wannadance,
or, dancer if I may,

When I joined this forum, I spent time browsing the threads. One thread which fascinated me was 'the Clubhouse'.
It may interest you to know why.
I honestly thought the contributors to that thread were guys 'in drag', as it were. So, yourself, Mrs Roops, Silkenshadow etc were pretending ... but doing it very well, I must say, and adding a lovely tone of humour.
I did not expect that women, except for the models, would be members of a porn site. But, I now realise that was my shortcoming.
I was also very impressed by the quality and originality of the writing in that thread.
It was only a few weeks ago, whilst in communication with Mrs Roops, that it became apparent that I really was conversing with a lady. Then, I believed. A few days ago I became aware that Silkenshadow was also female (she stated in a post). As for yourself, I suspected a while ago.

You continue to write with good humour, understanding and friendliness. It is a little humbling, although I'm sure you wouldn't wish that. What branch of medicine were you in?

Well, thank-you for your definitions. It all helps, especially as I am trying to write a novel, and a thorough knowledge of terms is useful. One model has already been extremely helpful to me and I'm optimistic another will be.

Good luck with the toilet seat, by the way.

[ephemeron]

dancer
(hi, btw. i am a woman, live in america, disabled from polio in childhood and going blind, but, all in all, pretty cheerful for an ole lady. nice to meet you...glad you are here...set a while and have some ice tea...)

That 'set a while and have some ice tea' puts you in ( or from ) "The South". And it's a safe bet that your tea is served sweet and that you never serve rice without having gravy to go with it.

If'n u'd a said 'set a spell' I'd a stuck my head outside and hollered [to see if you were close enough to hear me]. I don't know if people in other parts of the world 'holler' or not. That's when you rare back and yell loud enough for them to hear you plumb at the other end of the 'hollow' or valley. I think only us folks in the Southern Appalachians measure time in spells. (Southern Appalachia = Mountain regions of eastern Kentucky and Tennessee, western Virginia and North Carolina, extreme north Georgia, and northeast Alabama) . Our ancestors came here (North America) in the late 1600's after having been kicked out of every other civilized place on earth. They kept moving farther away from civilization till they got into an area that was so rugged no one else wanted it. The westward expansion of the United States just kind of flowed around us. We have never been real trusting of outsiders, have a healthy disrespect for authority, and don't play well with others. As a result our language got isolated and we have a lot of lingustic structure left over from seventeenth century English. We spake the Kang's Anglish really gud: English is a whole different story.

I, for one, would hate to see those of you writing the blurbs change your choice of words for the sake of an international audience. Y'all are Australian. Be proud of it. If you say something I can't figure out, I'll come over here to the boards and find an interpreter. There's enough intelligent and semi-literate people here that we'll eventually sort it all out.

[lanbo]

There's enough intelligent and semi-literate people here that we'll eventually sort it all out.

Good, informative post.
Ok, do you think there are any wholly-literate people here, as well? I'm a bit worried at only being labelled semi-literate.

[tom2c7777]

Ephemeron,

Your comment on measuring time in spells brought to mind a couple of phrases these being: "Will you spell me" meaning 'will you take over for a short time while I have a short rest', or another being "Give me a spell on that" meaning 'let me have a go'. So, no you are not all alone measuring time in spells in the Southern Appalachians.

I like what you say about not changing the choice of words for an international audience, it's good to pick new words, concepts and ways of saying things and who knows maybe we'll create another dialect of the Kangs Anglish or should that be Abbys Anglish.

tom

[wannadance]

thnk you so much for your thoughtful and complimentary post. i was in respiratory care and i loved it so much.

there are, i guess, more than several wholly-literate people here. i am one, but truly i am losing much of it in the morass of pain, disability and approaching endtimes.

takochan is unfuckingbelievably literate. and has a wonderful sense of humor, warmth, a loving nature and is generally respected and beloved here.

forgive me, all, i must have brekkie and gallons of strong tea before i can wake up sufficiently to continue....

lanbo, congrats on your novel writing project. my daughter is a professional writer who just birthed her second publication. i look at her, breathtakingly beautiful as well, and think: where did she come from? another planet? although i distinctly remember birthing her...hmmm..

more later.

dancer

[ephemeron]

I'm not sure anyone is ever completely, totally, wholly literate. An average educated English speaking person knows about 20,000 words and uses about 2000 of them in normal day to day conversation. As your level of education increases, or your reading continues and ranges into new areas, your vocabulary grows. I have a working vocabulary of between 90,000 and 100,000 words (of which I can correctly spell maybe 70 without a spell checker ). That's still only one-sixth of the English language. And I don't speak more than a word or two of any of the other 2700 know human languages. It's taken over half of my life to get to this point so I figure semi-literate is probably the best I can ever hope for.

[lanbo]

ephemeron:

I'm not sure anyone is ever completely, totally, wholly literate. An average educated English speaking person knows about 20,000 words and uses about 2000 of them in normal day to day conversation. As your level of education increases, or your reading continues and ranges into new areas, your vocabulary grows. I have a working vocabulary of between 90,000 and 100,000 words (of which I can correctly spell maybe 70 without a spell checker ). That's still only one-sixth of the English language. And I don't speak more than a word or two of any of the other 2700 know human languages. It's taken over half of my life to get to this point so I figure semi-literate is probably the best I can ever hope for.

You raise interesting points. Firstly, how do you know your working vocabulary? Have you done a test that establishes a hard figure?
Secondly, does anyone, living or dead, in your opinion, deserve to be called wholly literate?

Thirdly, why do you say you can correctly spell maybe 70? I looked at your 2 posts and found 1 spelling mistake (linguistic).
I think Takochan is the established linguist on this forum. Takochan, if you're reading, can you comment? I would be interested to know the extent of your vocabulary.

Odette is an advanced literature graduate. I wonder how she describes herself on the literate-scale?
I have to say that being semi-literate, for me, carries negative connotations. A bit like remedial.
I'm sure you meant no offence.

[ephemeron]

Firstly, how do you know your working vocabulary? Have you done a test that establishes a hard figure?
I've had extensive cognitive testing done during the last eight years. I've developed some weird and debilitating physical and mental health problems and been forced to take an early disability retirement. I've learned a lot of useless facts (like the size of my vocabulary) but still don't have a clue about what's wrong with me.


Secondly, does anyone, living or dead, in your opinion, deserve to be called wholly literate?No. But everyone tells me I'm wrong so I probably am. I know a fair number of people who are highly literate: they are fluent in multiple languages. I also know people who are very intelligent but who are illiterate--their brains simply don't have the proper wiring for handling written language.


Thirdly, why do you say you can correctly spell maybe 70? I kant spel. 70 was just a wild guess--it might be lower than that;). When I was taking placement exams for college I was called to my adviser's office for a talk. She said that there must have been some problem with the scoring of the spelling exam and that I needed to talk it again. I did. It didn't improve any. Then she had me retake the reading comprehension exam. I did. It came back the same. It turns out that I was reading on a Post Doctoral level but couldn't spell at a third grade level which was a low as the test could score. My adviser couldn't figure out how anyone could understand all those big words but couldn't spell any of them. I've never figured it out either.

[lanbo]

Ephemeron,
Regarding the spelling problem you had (or have), I just don't understand. I checked your last post, and I didn't see even one mistake, except for your 'on purpose; kant spel' Now, most people would make at least one error, given the range of words used.
Please bear with me; I am not knowledgeable about mental health problems, but is it possible you are deluding yourself into thinking you 'cant spel', when, in fact, you are excellent at it.

[wolfgangbuster29]

"Holy thread revival, Bat-Man!"

Helping to restore focus on the topic of the thread, I've been noticing that Sue-Ann has been doing virtually all of the new descriptions on the member's homepage and I have to say she is doing one sweet and wonderful job. I know it's a wonderful job when I come to this thread and then realize I wasn't even noticing any redundancy in the individual descriptions, they're all written with such finesse and creativity. Way-to-go, Sue-Ann. You are the champ.:):)

[sue-ann]

fangs!

[sue-ann]

..'cause you're a wolf - geddit?

oh nevermind... :)

[briggfair]

I am too new here to ever have seen Centaur's shoot introductions that started this thread but, Wolfgang, I agree with your assessment of Sue-Ann's lovely and creative descriptions. Every day I do enjoy them and the cheek-in-tongue comment to the POTD first before I seek my way further down to the treasures that one can find at AW.

[wolfgangbuster29]

..'cause you're a wolf - geddit?

oh nevermind... :)

lol-lol-lloll:D:D:D You're woof-um!

[sue-ann]

I am too new here to ever have seen Centaur's shoot introductions that started this thread but, Wolfgang, I agree with your assessment of Sue-Ann's lovely and creative descriptions. Every day I do enjoy them and the cheek-in-tongue comment to the POTD first before I seek my way further down to the treasures that one can find at AW.

Let's just clarify - I don't write the Pic of the Day comments any more ;(