AW Education: How can I tell if she just wants to make-out, not have sex?

[Frans]

AW Education: How can I tell if she just wants to make-out, not have sex??

[Yara]

It makes me sad to see how many girls would use excuses to not have sex with someone. It's not that you should feel guilty about your boundaries, or be ashamed of them. You dont owe your sexuality to anyone right? I know it's way easier to make up an excuse (I did it too) but it still sucks.
When I made up excuses, it always went from bad to worse, like
''Nope, sorry, I'm a lesbian'' ''Oh, but I can make you straight'' or ''With me you can have real sex''
Now, I just say, ''No, I dont want to have sex'' and sometimes a guy starts pushing, but then his ass should be properly kicked.

[Dekoda]

As a guy, I never expect sex from a woman. If she started making out with me, then I was happy with that. I never tried to push it further. If she wanted to have sex with me, she would have given me signals that were clear to me that she didn't want to just make out. If she didn't indicate that she wanted to go further, I wouldn't have tried to go further. To me, it's all about respect for the woman, and respecting whatever boundaries she has.

[laktor]

As a guy, I never expect sex from a woman. If she started making out with me, then I was happy with that. I never tried to push it further. If she wanted to have sex with me, she would have given me signals that were clear to me that she didn't want to just make out. If she didn't indicate that she wanted to go further, I wouldn't have tried to go further. To me, it's all about respect for the woman, and respecting whatever boundaries she has.

Well said, Dekoda. I only faced this situation once, and, as it turned out, I accidentally touched her breasts (over her clothes) and she took my hand away and said "Don't touch my breasts". Still, it was the only make out session I ever had, and I remember it fondly.

[Frans]

''Nope, sorry, I'm a lesbian'' ''Oh, but I can make you straight'' or ''With me you can have real sex''
Now, I just say, ''No, I dont want to have sex'' and sometimes a guy starts pushing, but then his ass should be properly kicked.

Yep, that's the right approach. No excuses needed or wanted, as those just make the decision less clear. Clear communication is very helpful to both parties involved
It is sorta cute how some girls want to be subtle about it, but running away when the guy is getting drinks isn't very nice. Just be more direct.

[Dekoda]

Well said, Dekoda. I only faced this situation once, and, as it turned out, I accidentally touched her breasts (over her clothes) and she took my hand away and said "Don't touch my breasts". Still, it was the only make out session I ever had, and I remember it fondly.

Sometimes, you never know what a woman wants, and those are the times that make life difficult.

Years ago, I started dating a woman that lived in a neighboring state....needless to say, it was a long drive to her apartment. We had only been on two dates when she suggested that we go to the state fair in her state. I thought it was a good idea, so we planned on going to the state fair the following weekend. The thing was, I was working on third shift, so if we went to the state fair on a Saturday, I'd have to work on Friday night, drive home and get a few hours sleep on Saturday morning, then drive all the way to her house, pick her up, then drive to the state fair. After thinking about it, I suggested to her that it would be better if she slept at my house on Friday night, saving me the hassle of driving all the way to her house to pick her up on Saturday. When I mentioned this to her, she looked a little wary and asked me, "What are you implying?" Realizing what she meant, I said that I wasn't implying anything...that I didn't intend on sleeping with her, because I would be working that night and she would be by herself in my house.

She said that she didn't like the idea of being alone in my house (I had this house built in a fairly remote area), so, thinking about it, I said that I would take off of work on Friday night, and that I would give her my bedroom to sleep in, and I would sleep downstairs in my basement family room. She agreed to that. When Friday came, I picked her up and we went to visit her sister, who lived really close to my house. When we left her sister's house, I drove to my house. Once we were inside my house, I showed her the bedroom, and since she didn't have anything to wear to bed, I gave her a pair of my jogging shorts and a tee shirt.(The jogging shorts are made of a synthetic fabric, and they have the underwear sewn in.) I gave her some clean towels, showed her where everything was, then told her goodnight, and I started to head down to the family room when she stopped me and said that she felt bad about kicking me out of my own bed. I told her that it was okay and that it was cozy down in my family room, so I was fine going down there to sleep. She insisted that it would be okay it we slept in the same bed together...she would be fine with that, so I said okay and we got in bed together.

As we were laying there, she rolled over and placed her head on my chest.(I was only wearing a pair of jogging shorts myself.... and no shirt, as wearing a shirt in bed makes it too hot for me.) She laid there with her head on my chest for a while, then she looked up and started kissing me. After a bit, I started caressing her neck...then kissing her neck, and I could tell that she liked it. Eventually, after she had been rubbing my chest, I started rubbing her back...through the tee-shirt. Then, I moved my hand up the inside of the tee-shirt and started rubbing her breasts. I wasn't sure how far she wanted to go, so I proceeded slowly.

She finally started rubbing her pussy up and down my leg (through her jogging shorts), so I slowly moved my hand down her back until I reached her ass. As soon as I touched her ass, she said, "Let's not get carried away here!" When she said that, I immediately removed my hand from her ass, gave her a kiss goodnight, and rolled over so that I was facing away from her. I was afraid that I had done something wrong, and I didn't want to do anything else that might upset her. I mean, kissing me, caressing my chest, rubbing her pussy up and down my leg....then to stop me and say that I was going too far, really screwed up my head. I was only trying to read her signals to me, and what I read, seemed like a green light, but apparently it wasn't, so you never know what a woman is thinking or what she wants to do.