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    Tips for making my gf cum

    Does anyone have tips for making my gf cum? She's not into oral, but when I touch her she get close sometimes. Yet she doesn't go all the way. I rub her clit and finger her. What sort of speed or pressure should I give her?

    #2
    John I think a lot of answer to this will be the same - ask her what she wants and do that, every womans different you see. This week alone I have shot a video with a model who can come from the slightest touch to her delicate vaginal area and anything more is painful and another who needs to scrub away with vigor before she explodes with pleasure. It can be quite errotic to mastubrate together - that way you can see how she does it and indeed she can see how you like to be pleasured as well.

    My big hint though is pay attention to the build up. Before you even get near her genitals lightly touch her all over with soft finger tips, then add in your mouth. maybe get her to close her eyes so she doesn't know with which hand or on which body part she is going to be touched next.

    Keep at it have fun - someone find this a lot harder to do than others, my early partners really had to work very hard and I have had to put in quite a lot of personal time exploring how to get myself off before it all fit together in a semi regular way. xxx

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by masie View Post
      John I think a lot of answer to this will be the same - ask her what she wants and do that, every womans different you see. This week alone I have shot a video with a model who can come from the slightest touch to her delicate vaginal area and anything more is painful and another who needs to scrub away with vigor before she explodes with pleasure. It can be quite errotic to mastubrate together - that way you can see how she does it and indeed she can see how you like to be pleasured as well.

      My big hint though is pay attention to the build up. Before you even get near her genitals lightly touch her all over with soft finger tips, then add in your mouth. maybe get her to close her eyes so she doesn't know with which hand or on which body part she is going to be touched next.

      Keep at it have fun - someone find this a lot harder to do than others, my early partners really had to work very hard and I have had to put in quite a lot of personal time exploring how to get myself off before it all fit together in a semi regular way. xxx
      Sadly, she has a phobia of her vagina juice via-a-vis kissing me. I find that she experiences pain sometimes when I touch her. I never experienced that with other women.

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        #4
        Maybe try through her undies if she is very sensitive or just having her sit on your knee as you are gently strokign her arms so she can wiggle around on a soft but hard area. I find that my mind is the key to turning me on so maybe there is potential to explore that area. Years and years ago a partner of mine found an erotic story that was so intune with the things that turn me on that I came twice just by having it read to me! - Good luck, just knowing she has a lovely supportive man who is with her on her journey to finding out how she can enjoy her body to new heights must be a wonderful thing - enjoy the ride together, the build to orgasm for many is almost better than the real thing - certainly true in my case

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          #5
          Originally posted by masie View Post
          Maybe try through her undies if she is very sensitive or just having her sit on your knee as you are gently strokign her arms so she can wiggle around on a soft but hard area. I find that my mind is the key to turning me on so maybe there is potential to explore that area. Years and years ago a partner of mine found an erotic story that was so intune with the things that turn me on that I came twice just by having it read to me! - Good luck, just knowing she has a lovely supportive man who is with her on her journey to finding out how she can enjoy her body to new heights must be a wonderful thing - enjoy the ride together, the build to orgasm for many is almost better than the real thing - certainly true in my case
          I've been with women who came easily. My girlfriend is a challenge. I don't know if its her age. She's 42. But I finger her. I play with her clit. Yet she can't cum. I keep telling her to guide me to no avail. What else should I do?

          What do you do when you are with another woman to make her cum?

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by johnross12 View Post
            I've been with women who came easily. My girlfriend is a challenge. I don't know if its her age. She's 42. But I finger her. I play with her clit. Yet she can't cum. I keep telling her to guide me to no avail. What else should I do?

            What do you do when you are with another woman to make her cum?
            Maybe stop trying so hard to make her come and worrying about it so much?

            From what I've read and what women have told me, orgasms are not always all that important for a woman. She can have a lovely time making love without coming at the end of it.

            so maybe just do what you like and pay attention to how she reacts. Maybe she'll come and maybe she won't. And if she doesn't come and it doesn't worry her, why should it worry you?

            And if you're not so anxious about it yourself and you just relax and very, very gently get into it, maybe she'll do the same. And them maybe she will come after all.
            Last edited by JacksonP49; 2 September 2015, 01:00 AM.

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by masie View Post
              John I think a lot of answer to this will be the same - ask her what she wants and do that, every womans different you see. This week alone I have shot a video with a model who can come from the slightest touch to her delicate vaginal area and anything more is painful and another who needs to scrub away with vigor before she explodes with pleasure. It can be quite errotic to mastubrate together - that way you can see how she does it and indeed she can see how you like to be pleasured as well.

              My big hint though is pay attention to the build up. Before you even get near her genitals lightly touch her all over with soft finger tips, then add in your mouth. maybe get her to close her eyes so she doesn't know with which hand or on which body part she is going to be touched next.

              Keep at it have fun - someone find this a lot harder to do than others, my early partners really had to work very hard and I have had to put in quite a lot of personal time exploring how to get myself off before it all fit together in a semi regular way. xxx
              Do women have an easier time cumming if their pussy is licked before or during fingering prior to intercourse?

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by johnross12 View Post
                Do women have an easier time cumming if their pussy is licked before or during fingering prior to intercourse?
                If I may say so, your approach seems entirely too clinical.

                Three things that stand out to me are:

                1) You're too goal-oriented. In fact, you seem preoccupied with the idea of bringing her to orgasm. You might be stressing her out in that respect.

                To put it in perspective, imagine if somebody told you to say something funny. On the spot, out of the blue, off-hand: be funny. I guarantee you that, unless you're a professional comic and you have a rehearsed answer for this kind of shit... you're going to bomb. Either you force out a joke that falls flat, or you mumble to yourself and walk away.

                So that's kind of what you put your partner through if you're too focused on making her cum. You may not say it outright, but she'll pick up on it. And that will only make things more difficult, for both of you.

                Instead, think of sex as a conversation: a sexy, sexy conversation, where the "humor" emerges organically and spontaneously. Does that make sense?

                2) If she experiences pain when you try to stimulate her, she might consider seeing a doctor. There are treatable conditions that may be the cause.

                3) If she has trouble communicating her desires, there could be several explanations. Maybe she doesn't feel comfortable telling you about them. Maybe she doesn't know how to articulate them. Maybe she's ashamed of them. In any case, the problem isn't about licking or fingering this or that. It's a more serious problem that affects not just sex, but the rest of your relationship.

                Hope this helps.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by johnross12 View Post
                  Do women have an easier time cumming if their pussy is licked before or during fingering prior to intercourse?
                  The only person who can answer this question is her. Every woman is different and each one will have a different answer to this question. For some girls, having their pussy licked is necessary to make them come; for others (like me) it does absolutely nothing without fingering as well. The only advice or suggestion anyone can give you is to ASK HER.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Jada View Post
                    The only person who can answer this question is her. Every woman is different and each one will have a different answer to this question. For some girls, having their pussy licked is necessary to make them come; for others (like me) it does absolutely nothing without fingering as well. The only advice or suggestion anyone can give you is to ASK HER.
                    She has this frustrating idea that I should just know. I've been with other women who were a lot easier to pleasure. Maybe its her age. She's in her 40s.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Have you tried playing with a vibrator together? You could get a nice strong one, or play around with a vibrating cock ring. Lots of options there which tend to work VERY well.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by renae_d View Post
                        Have you tried playing with a vibrator together? You could get a nice strong one, or play around with a vibrating cock ring. Lots of options there which tend to work VERY well.
                        What do you find works with the girls you are with when you try making them cum?

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by johnross12 View Post
                          She has this frustrating idea that I should just know. I've been with other women who were a lot easier to pleasure. Maybe its her age. She's in her 40s.
                          Ahhh, so that's the situation... I understand you all too well now my friend. I'm going to give you a detailed description of what I do, and hopefully that will be helpful to you, but remember that this will not necessarily work for every woman.

                          I'm not going to get too much into foreplay here because that's just too complicated for the moment, but one of the key things to make sure of before getting anywhere near her vagina is to make sure she is already excited mentally (and preferably also physically). I don't know her so I can't tell you how to do this, but I can tell you that for me, if I'm not in the mood or mentally turned on, no amount of genital stimulation will change that.

                          So after my partner is excited, I usually start by gently stroking around her vagina with my fingers. This means teasing her vulva, petting her outer labia, maybe gently tugging on the inner labia, but for now no direct vaginal or clitoral stimulation. I also like to stroke the upper and inner thighs as well. This can help to relax your partner and focus on the sensation without feeling pressured to engage immediately in a sexual action or be completely ready to enter this state.
                          After this, I continue with the same area and motions but using my mouth instead. Kissing her thighs, putting my tongue in the creases between the outer and inner labia, continue stroking her legs with my hands, massage her hips, etc.
                          When i see that she seems excited and is ready for more (if you're unsure you can ask if what you're doing feels nice), then is where I move to more direct stimulation. I generally start with my lips and tongue stroking up and down slowly from her clit to the opening of her vagina and back again, keeping my tongue flat. After doing this a few times I point my tongue and use the hard tip to flick back and forth across her clit. Some girls will like very direct clit stimulation and will want the skin covering it to be pulled back. Others are quite sensitive and will want to be stimulated on top of the skin so they can feel through it. If she's sensitive (I think you mentioned before that she is), just lick on top of the skin instead of pulling it up to expose the hard knob of her clit.
                          After doing this for a while, I try to read her body cues as to when to go to the next step, which for me is inserting fingers. If she's throwing her head back, moaning or whimpering, or her body is trembling/squirming a bit, these are good signs.
                          The type of fingering is also going to be different with different girls. Some like just one finger and some like two or three. Some want you to keep your fingers straight and push them in and out, and some want you to keep them inside and move only your fingertips in a "come here" motion. (Lol, come here--bad pun)
                          I would recommend trying several or all of these methods and seeing which one she reacts most to or seems to like the best. But in any case start out gently and slowly with one finger, and pick up speed and intensity when she seems ready.
                          While fingering, I tend to do a variety of things with my tongue on the clit--sucking on it (careful never to use teeth!), licking it with a flat tongue, flicking it with the tip of my tongue, or doing multiple techniques at the same time. Many girls need a very steady rythm in order to come, so once you get into a rythm that she seems to really like, don't change it! Keep the same speed and technique and intensity if she seems close to coming. If she seems close but not quite able to go over the edge, you can try a little harder or faster. Unless she seems to be sorta in pain, and then obviously slow down and be more gentle. The right rythm will be different for every girl, you just have to watch her reactions.

                          I know the way I described it seems like a lot to remember and like a very step-by-step, ordered thing, but it's really not. Obviously it will change depending on the situation or her feeling. But there's at least a base for you to work with that I hope will be helpful
                          Last edited by Jada; 1 October 2015, 09:48 AM.

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                            #14
                            Also, you may have to accept the fact that she will not come before intercourse. I never do. I always come during. Some girls prefer to always come after. It's not absolutely necessary that she comes during foreplay. Maybe she needs a lot of stimulation and build up before she can reach that point

                            Comment


                              #15
                              This just popped into my FB feed from the Kinsey Institute - http://www.thedailybeast.com/article...rgasm-gap.html

                              Direct link to the website - https://www.omgyes.com

                              Unfortunately the site isn't free, but from checking out one of the samples it's extremely well presented. Of course, clear and authentic communication with partners is always going to be best, but for those who are currently without a partner, or want to try something new, this could be a great resource (for those with the privilege of being able to afford it)

                              Comment

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